Sunday, April 21, 2013

Bitches

 So I just watched Bachelorette on Netflix streaming, fully ready to find it vile and horrifying beyond normal expectations. Because all the information I had on it previously was comparing it to Bridesmaids. Totally different movies, y'all.

Once Bridesmaids became a hit, there were too many op eds about women, friendship, legitimacy compared to MAN fare (i.e. the Hangover movies). And I guess if any movie dared to feature a group of women after Bridesmaids, it had to be compared...because women live in a vacuum of predictability, I guess. The overall opinion was that Bachelorette was a bitter, vapid shell that was trying to be Bridesmaids. The thing is...well, that just isn't true.

Both movies are valid representations of women with women being all womany. At the heart of each is jealousy. And that's the pertinent thing...they manifest differently, but even among friends, bitches be bitches.

Plenty of bitches will rail against this stereotype, as if women have not been brainwashed from birth to be in constant competition with each other. Get a grip. This is where we live, females. It is, as they say, our "wheelhouse." Bitches be bitches.

But what was completely annoying about the press regarding Bachelorette was how much they honed in on it. How it was defeating to women, how it was depraved beyond reality, how it was exploitative and shameful. HELLO. Women have been living this truth since I can remember. How about Steel Magnolias when Shelby's cousin says that's a fine man and Shelby says "Yes, I know." How about Vasques calling Ripley "Snow White" and dressing her down in front of her male counterparts in the debriefing in Aliens? How about 90% of every rom com you have ever seen? Back to Sigourney...how about that time she shivved Melanie Griffith in the back in Working Girl? The list goes on and on.

So how is Bachelorette different? It isn't. It is a mildly amusing, engaging movie about jealous bitches and their friend who is getting married. Not exploring new territory here, folks.

The true shame is how the media latched on to the Bridesmaids context and decided it defined women. And that every movie featuring more than one woman would then be compared to that. News for you, fucks, movies follow stereotypes, movies are more extreme than real life, even those set in "reality." But every time you impose a construct and assume that all things are defined by that, then as much as you push your feminist agenda, you are really just feeding off of the same old tropes.

When you review a movie, review it without comparing it to anything else. Stop trying to make everything into a political statement. It's cunty. And yes, I said "cunt." What does the world have to say about that?