Contrarian

Everyone else is loving the new season of Heroes. I am growing increasingly annoyed. Maybe I just miss the good old days when it was all so new – to us, to them – and Sylar was the wackadoodle crazy that struck fear in the hearts of the extraordinary. The powers seemed genuine, logical, and compelling for each character introduced – even those with short life spans – but now? They just seem jammed on, shoved through, and used up faster than you can say Milo Ventimiglia. Speaking of:

• Milo Ventimiglia x 2 is annoying. Yay, they shot one. Now we only have to listen to the Kirk-y delivery once. I miss the sweet doof of season 1.
• The new Nikki plotline annoys. Triplets, bah.
• Matt Parkman’s story is contrived beyond contrived. Do all “artists of the future times” create only graphic art? This seems constrictive in a lazy way, not in a cool way.
• Linderman is the New Number 6? Why is Nathan Petrelli haunted by this ghosty fool? I wonder, too, when Linderman will start growling seductively in Nathan’s ear, trying to sex him up. Even the divine providence mimics Battlestar Gallactica – shame!
• Ugh, Daphne. I want to lawnmow that ridiculous hair. She’s a 3rd rate, meet cute, bad Lifetime movie sub character. Try. Harder. Writers.
• Why does Bad Claire have to have brown hair? Because that hasn’t been done before? They should have put a discreet little mustachio on her.

The things I do like, sadly, fit in two bullet points:

• Sweeeeeeeeeeeet, Mohinder is a spookity.
• Sylar is my favorite forevers. I am so glad he is Spock.

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SIDE NOTE: For those still emotionally invested in the heretofore unnamed historical building, they’ve been digging and soldering and basically jacking up the basement for a month or more. I believe they may be digging a hole to Hell – thank you, construction crew, for bringing the Amityville Horror straight to 5th avenue – so sometimes the smell of burnt sulfur lilts up the staircase and permeates the building like a hot cheese poop bomb. Yay, burning hair! I was visiting the Mythical, Odor Challenged 3rd Floor Bathroom when I overheard one of the mailroom guys yell, “Do you smell that? What should we do? You know what the sign says? ‘If you smell something, say something.’” Sorry, mailroom dude, but the MTA don’t give a flip. Those that dig Satan’s canal will not be stopped. Nice try, tho. (PS. If you are confused, go here. This ad campaign has been going on ever since 9/11. It’s safe to say that it’s well embedded in the NYC psyche now.)

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PS, Super Side Note:

Quote of the Decade: “Shut up, Ray, before I stomp you dead in your juicy big lips!” – Bridezillas