Saturday, September 06, 2008

Most Horrible Songs Ever

Open for debate, if you wish, but I am right. These songs suck hard.

12. Into the Night – Benny Mardones (disgusting pedophile rapist)

11. I Wanna Sex You Up – Color Me Badd (loser freaks with no game)

10. Don’t Worry, Be Happy – Bobby McFerrin (ugh)

9. The Future’s So Bright I Gotta Wear ShadesTimbuk3 (the lamest of lame things that are lame)

8. Wild Wild West – The Escape Club (loser freaks with no game)

7. Night Shift - Commodores (snore)

6. No One Is to Blame – Howard Jones (snore)

5. It Must Have Been LoveRoxette (and every Roxette song and her reedy, whiny horror)

4. Baby I Love Your Way – Will to Power (snore…and sacrilege)

3. Somewhere Out There – Linda Ronstadt (that which makes me violent and feel the urge to machine gun things)

2. That’s What Friends Are For - Dionne Warwick, etc. (vomit snooze, lame, manipulative, vile sap)

1. We Built This City - Starship (beyond explanation – a genuine horror)

Go ahead, click to link. Masochist.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

The closest I have come to wringing a student's neck is when this snot-nosed punk insisted, over and over again, that Bob MARLEY wrote and performed Don't Worry, Be Happy. Die! Die! Die! Youngling.

Oh, goody! Another CAPTCHA.

2:53 AM  
Blogger Shiny said...

Because you know, all pre-90s afro-pop, non-rap or smooove jazz soul music is, in fact, Bob Marley. Or Billy Ocean? Hm. Right?

I realized that everything on this list is from the 80s. There have been horrible songs since the 80s, I just stopped compulsively listening to the radio.

Oh, and I didn't name one of the songs correctly: VERY IMPORTANT. It is the "Baby I Love Your Way / Freebird Medley." Play it if you need to loosen your bowels.

9:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What about the 60's and 70's? You know, when I was young.

5:13 PM  

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