Monday, August 20, 2007

I Just Have to Say

...that my bodacious body is too large and in charge for the button-up oxford I'm wearing today. The buttons are looking worried. Fear not, buttons. Only five hours to go.

My tan is fake, my nails are shredded, and I need a pedicure. Looks like that trip to the beach was totally worth it. As a side note, can I just say: It is not that I do not like children, precisely. It is that I do not like to be around them. I also do not like it when certain people expect me to act maternally toward certain 2-year-olds who may or may not be cute in theory but may or may not be a royal pain in the ass for four days straight, allegedly.

Don't worry, though. I'm sure I like your children.


Blogger Flushy McBucketpants said...

my children? news to me. they'd have to be test-tube babies. i like test-tubes. they're totally, like, tubular.

12:42 AM  
Blogger Shiny said...

Mmm hmm. Your tubular children, Mr. Pants. If they are anything like you, they can really turn out some funkytown footsteps. You know how you are.

3:19 PM  

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