Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Grand Chicken of Dreams


So in 1996 I was registering for wedding gifts at Dillard's department store in Overland Park, Kansas. As I noted the china, towels, ladels and whatnot that would eventually do little to nothing to save the sinking ship of my marriage (o! grand dreams) I came upon a sight I cannot unsee, even now, some 10 years later: a large, brilliantly colored, ceramic rooster, shimmering with iridescent sealant. I think it was a cookie jar. No matter. I wanted it. Bad.

But sometimes we don't get what we want. Even if we could register for it alongside the idiotic garlic baker that we use only once and then say, Hm, that was stupid waste of time to produce goo. It was there, in my sights, in my grasp. But my BETTER JUDGMENT made me walk away. No sane person asks another sane person to spend $60 on a chicken. Even if it is a giant, glowing, mystical Chicken of Destiny.

Piss.

So. Now I look for it everywhere. I've even ventured back to the origin of the obsession, but they now have lesser-chickens, almost as if they mean to mock me, torture me for forsaking the Rooster of 96. Hateful retailers.

So, I will continue to search for it...next stop eBay, I suppose. If anyone has any knowledge of a Grand Chicken of Dreams (or, cookie jar) please let me know.

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